Hinglish: In every sense and use of the word.

"Circulatory system consist of two words which are cardiac;  which are related to heart; which are related to arteries and veins."

"# of heartbeat per minute is called heartrate. It is differ from Man to Man."

"Stroke Volume: Is the total amount of blood pumped during the exercise it increases"

"It has been scientifically proven that men are better than women."

WTF?!?

Yes. That's my P.E teacher speaking. YES, TEACHER! Sad isn't it. He is supposedly a full qualified Physical Education teacher who has "Mastery of English". If he has 'Mastery' of English, then why does he feel so insecure that when we correct him on such errors he resorts to heavy doses of hindi swearing including the staple:

Chooprei (I can't spell  Hindi. Mein Thoda Thoda Hindi Bol Sakta Hoon)

(Shut Up in Hindi...)

I hate this guy with a passion, he's a total moron. He thinks he's the greatest thing since the remote (notice the cliche evasion). He's a chubby, 5'2" single loser who can bench about 175. I'm thinner, faster, taller (6'1") and can bench 205. What can HE teach me? 

And this moron can't spell for shit either, not to mention the horrifying handwriting. I recall one fateful day in which me, and the other two toothpicks in my class who opted for P.E were being forced to listen to this dick dictate, when he came on to teaching us about the

TRYcuspid and BYcuspid in the heart. 

When my friend Raunaq said, "Sir, it's spelled T-R-I and B-I na?" 

Abhishek Sir, his touchy spot having been aggravated (That being his Hinglish; "Cuz ain't nobody gonna fuck with his damn hinglish")  rips his shirt off, revealing a lackluster, HAIRY, chubby body (this is when the horror music from Hitchcock's Psycho starts playing) and parades around the room asking us to feel his chest and biceps. I'm about 70% sure he doesn't have any Michael Jaskon-esque tendancies. 

well, 60% sure.

GOD there's so much more. 

My mom, on HER Blog, put up a post entitled, "My Son Thinks Indian's Can't Diss." I wasn't referring to ALL indians, (I AM NOT RACIST) I mainly meant the kids in my school. The insult's here are mostly translated from hindi into english.

But I DO have a point, as my mom stated on her post, I was arguing with my friend Kunal and I said "Suck ma ballsack" (immature, I know. But I'm 15 so you can suck my ballsack.) and he returned, " Come on, open it! You don't have the guts! I swear I'll suck it!" 

Then again, that just might be the best comeback ever, for I was left utterly speechless.

It doesn't stop at Kunal, it continues to Raunaq, "I'll shave your head bitch!".

Finally, it's Sagar, who upon being called an ass says,

"Bitch I'll suck your cock!".